Im my last job there were 2 developers, me and and another woman, and the visual designers were all men. I’ve worked with some great guys – I think there are a lot of very smart (if smart equates to intellectual) people in IT and I find generally that all the smartest ones who have done the coolest stuff, don’t judge you on your gender, but on your brain/enthusiasm/love for the same thing. Admittedly on first meeting people may make assumptions (like the salespeople mentioned above), but as soon as you clarify, they drop the assumption and all is good.

However, a major downside of my career has been that I get boxed into ‘people’ roles, partly because I pick up tasks that no one wants to do (I blame my parents old fashioned work ethics), but also I think (at the risk of being sexist) women, even geek women, have a more natural ability to communicate etc, so you end up team leading, co-ordinating, administering. I don’t want to do this and I hate it, but when I talk about what I want to do (technical/enterprise architecture, security), doors seem to close, people turn away. My feeling is its desirable to be a female developer, particularly in web etc (as this is seen as ’softer’), but if you head for the jobs where you are telling male developers how to to design and build their systems… I know also that I am not an aggressive person, and have not fought hard for what I wanted, but I’m a nerd not a fighter

My current perspective is that that you feel that you push against the tide, then you lose a bit of your youthful idealism that you can change things, you are still having to push as hard, then you start questioning your happiness in your chosen career and this happiness issue seems to be a key factor in women turning away.

BUT BUT, I have been immensely encouraged by the things I have read, and have remembered that there are all sorts of stereotypes but there are also a lot of great people who respect others regardless of gender or anything else.

Apologies for bad grammar.

The worst case I had in IT was when I went for an interview as a web developer, and was told at the interview that the reason they had decided to see me was they had never heard of a female developer! I wouldn’t mind so much but this wasn’t a small firm it was an ISP.

I don’t know the solution, but I sure can smell the problem. And it isn’t going to get better if we don’t open our mouths and (reaching for a diplomatic word here) CLARIFY for our male colleagues what truths they’re missing when they do just that.

The other thing is, we can’t hold ourselves back and while I’ve never been a parent, it occurs to me that women are often the primary caregiver to children. Why does this poor behavior exists? And it is behavior because if it were nature ALL men would be prejudiced and thank god there are many who are wonderful colleagues, friends and partners and do not participate in this sort of nonsense.